Survive Global Warming

Some scientists claim that the earth is getting warmer, and many others claim that it's not. Polar ice caps might be melting, they might be getting bigger. It might happen next year, it might happen a thousand years from now. It might be caused by car emissions, or it might just be caused by the sun (you know, that big warm thing).

Whatever happens, the best thing to do, is to be prepared! After all, it is the Scout motto.

So how do you prepare for something as insane and potentially disastrous as spontaneous global warming? Here's my top 10.

1. Learn to swim. Particularily how to tread water. If the world ice suddenly melts and floods, you'll need to do this for a while.

2. Stock up on food and gasoline. Probably not necessary, but the crazy paranoid survivalists out there seem to like doing it.

3. Bring a gun. Useful in any situation. Especially when playing king-of-the-hill with the rest of the world, fighting for the last scrap of land. (Ever seen Waterworld?)

4. Wear rubber boots. Most scientists agree that the earth will only rise by 1.5°C over the next hundred years or so, and the oceans will only rise by about 4 inches. Keep your feet dry.

5. Plan longer vacations. It's going to be nice and warm out soon, so book those hot vacation spots before they're taken.

6. Wear a T-shirt that says "I supported the Kyoto-accord, and all I got was this lousy t-shirt, which cost me billions of dollars".

7. Donate your old snow-suits to the salvation army. Somebodies gotta need them, right?

8. Become a pirate. Haven't you always wanted to become a pirate?

9. Move. 3/4 of the worlds population lives only a few feet above sea level. I'd suggest the mountains.

10. Keep reading this blog. If global warming really does happen, things will be a bit more serious, and there's bound to be all sorts of useful information on here.

Survive Shawarma

Sure it's tasty, but getting through an entire shawarma sandwhich can be a daunting task. Just the thought of the resulting stomach ache, acid reflux, and terrible garlic breath is enough to turn you away from the meal entirely.

But as long as you're willing to dive, here's a few tips to get you through.

First of all, reputation is an important factor. Don't eat at just any shawarma restaurant. Be sure to find one that is generally clean, is known amongst the locals, and has no health inspection agency notices stuck to their window.

Go for chicken. While offering both beef and chicken, you can only get salmonella, whereas beef can contain all sorts of other exotic diseases. Since the meat slowly rotates for long periods of time under medium temperatures, the chances of contamination are relatively high.

Avoid the sauce. And if you must take the garlic sauce, use very little. You'll thank me for it.

Garnishes. They may have all sorts of additional garnishes, like onions, hot peppers, tabouli, tomatoes, lettuce, etc... Avoid anything in the onion family, or the pepper family. Leafy vegetables and tomatoes work best to keep your food and stomach acid where it should be.

Good luck, and happy eating!

Beginning

Our goal is to help you to survive any range of situation. From benign and realistic, to difficult and fantastical. No situation will remain untouched.

Sure some of them may be a little bizarre, like I don't really expect nuclear holocaust or alien abductions. But many people in their lifetime will run into a burglar breaking into their home, or get lost while hiking on a local trail. Not to mention the common occurrences of electrical blackouts and freak weather conditions.

Many future posts will be greatly informative, with a healthy dose of humor. Fueled by my past training and expertise.

So what qualifies me to write this blog?

When it comes to the wild and unrealistic, I'm a great reader of science fiction and fantasy, I watch countless movies, and play all sorts of video games.

For real and tangible experience, I have been a Scout for 16 years, and have lead courses on survival and trained people of all ages, experiences, and backgrounds. I've even had hands-on jungle survival training from former American green berets. I've built improvised emergency shelters in the arctic, I've de-husked coconuts in central america, I've caught animals in snares, I've stalked a moose, I've run class 4 rapids in an open canoe, and I've even made all sorts of things out of duct tape.

Whatever it may be, keep reading and learn how to survive it all.